10 July 2021 – Last night, I laid down to sleep, and I couldn’t. As usual, I had too much on my mind. I have always had a hard time falling asleep, but since I’ve been traveling, usually by the time I lay down, I am so tired that falling asleep is easy. Not last night though, I was thinking about everything. There have been a couple of things weighing on my mind that was just overwhelming me last night. When I let my thoughts get overwhelmed, it usually spirals out of control, and I can’t escape getting inside my head and letting the dark parts of my brain take over. So I was sleepless in Seattle, and I had to do something about it.

Prayer and I have a very complicated relationship. I am of the opinion that prayer does not work. People talk all the time about how they believe prayer works, but that has not been my experience. This doesn’t mean I don’t do it, though. I have been dedicated to praying every day for as long as I can remember. I always pray at night when I lay down. I pray thanksgiving for all I have, I pray for blessings for those I love, and I pray for specific people and specific issues as needed. Being one of those lucky people who hasn’t experienced answered prayers, my theory is that I am due for one or many to work. So, I pray.

While I was Sleepless in Seattle, I prayed. I prayed for every person I have met on my adventures, every person who has supported my adventures. I prayed for every family member and every coworker. I spent extra time praying for those closest to me and those I care about the most. So many people I love have things in their lives that need attention, and it brings me peace to pray for them. I know that I have no control over what happens to them, and in most cases, there is nothing I can do, so I pray. Does it help them? I can’t know. Does it help me? Yes. It makes me feel like I am doing something.

I have been praying every day for over a year and a half for a friend and his family. They have had a rough few years and have so much going on. This friend has brought me so many smiles and laughs and so much comfort; I just want his family to experience pockets of calm and happiness, and even peace and joy. My mom and sister have health issues that I can’t do anything about, so I just pray. I have a couple of friends who I just feel like need something in their lives, so I pray for them a little extra. Each week and each month, I pick someone or several someones, and I give them extra attention during my prayers.

Maybe one day, I will see the results of one of my prayers, but I am not counting on it. For now, prayer gives me some peace knowing that I have done something for others when I am unable to actually do something. When I am Sleepless in Seattle or St. Louis, or Yorktown, prayer helps me find some peace and eventually sleep.